What Do You Hate About Colombia?

goin_south says on Nov 6, 2009, 19:39:

Where's Simon?

I don't hate Simon.
I'm just already lamenting at all the stress he's going to incur as a result of this thread ;-((

nothin I say is to be takn for my words, but rather for the words of Sailor Jerry.

0 funny, 0 helpful.

nueva york bombero says on Nov 6, 2009, 19:43:

I hate Colombia right now because I'm stuck in Freezing NY!!!
Damn u Colombia!!!

0 funny, 1 helpful.

Londoner says on Nov 6, 2009, 19:47:

I hate the way any moron can rent a local,stick a sound system outside,and play high volume music all night,without any response from the authorities.

2 funny, 1 helpful.

goin_south says on Nov 6, 2009, 19:48:

yeah... I hate colombia because I don't think they're sheltering their fare share of the world's muslim terrorist population.
damn colombia ;-(

nothin I say is to be takn for my words, but rather for the words of Sailor Jerry.

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jb_fastpitch says on Nov 6, 2009, 20:12:

Yeah GS, and it looks like the "peaceful religion" was "hijacked" again at Ft Hood.

Choose Liberty, there is no such thing as equality.

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Cheers Terry says on Nov 6, 2009, 20:32:

Only one serious thing for me...

The banks. Colombia will always be a joke on the international scene until they fix their mess of a banking system.

When idiotic, backward Cuba's banking system kicks your ass you know you're a loser. Colombia is a loser.

I suspect even Simon will agree.

Cheers,
Terry

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Miguel says on Nov 6, 2009, 20:34:

Los bancos y la voz de la costa...nojoda

"There is nothing lower than the human race...except for the French." - Mark Twain 1878-79

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span_colombia says on Nov 6, 2009, 20:47:

not sure I agree about the gringo worship. most ambitious young colombians I know have little or no interest in traveling to the US, but instead would like to go to western europe, though that might be a reaction to US influence.

the low self esteem thing - I've certainly noticed that and colombians are quite sensitive to criticism or mention of drugs (they also have a LOT of national pride, like the the US or canada).

colombia is a unique place in the world in that its name has been synonymous with cocaine and farc rebel groups trying to overthrow the government (although I don't think that's necessarily still the perception). I think growing up in that shadow, feeling that the world sees you badly, has really affect the psyche of the entire country and caused many to become hyper-sensitive.

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Alejita says on Nov 6, 2009, 20:49:

I hate Colombia because if their economy wasnt so messed up, I could live there and make the same money I make here, and have a good life there instead of here.

Aleja

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Cheers Terry says on Nov 6, 2009, 21:02:

span_colombia, I deleted the gringo worship comment from my post above. That's a subject that requires its own thread.

For me, right now, it's the infantile banking system. It overshadows everything.

Cubans kicking your ass?!?! How embarrassing!!!

Cheers,
Terry

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love2travel says on Nov 6, 2009, 21:11:

What is "gringo worship"?

What is NMG? No money gringos?

Thanks.

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goin_south says on Nov 6, 2009, 21:28:

"if their economy wasnt so messed up" ... ?

Alejita.... wtf?

nothin I say is to be takn for my words, but rather for the words of Sailor Jerry.

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theflatline says on Nov 6, 2009, 21:34:

A frog and a guy from Philly.

Legaleez for Complete Morons - A book for gringos in Colombia for who think they understand the nature of the law in a country where they cannot speak the language.

1 funny, 1 helpful.

clyde says on Nov 6, 2009, 22:30:

Here we go: First, I agree with the banking system. In Ctg. I hate all the people who want to sell me stuff. In Bogota, the weather isn't great and there are a lot of college students with problems. In Medellin, I hate the city cause I had to leave all my fine chicas there when I came back to US. I love you all....long time

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viajero123 (☼Travelguide writer) says on Nov 6, 2009, 22:38:

Robert Jorge says on Nov 6, 2009, 23:28:

I have to agree with banks. Also, the cost of doing business. 90% tax on profit? Good luck.

"You can not take the barrio out of the girl you really can't." Oneforamillion

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love2travel says on Nov 6, 2009, 23:45:

What kinds of problems do the college students have?

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goin_south says on Nov 6, 2009, 23:53:

90 % tax?
Rj... are you still loosing blood??

nothin I say is to be takn for my words, but rather for the words of Sailor Jerry.

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Robert Jorge says on Nov 7, 2009, 00:43:

Talk to Gloid. The cost of doing business in Colombia is ridiculous. I'm serious, I saw the tax documents. If you make a million dollars profit in Colombia legally, you might be able to keep $50,000 of it. It's ridiculous.

"You can not take the barrio out of the girl you really can't." Oneforamillion

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Buongone says on Nov 7, 2009, 01:56:

Probably one reason why chit is kept hidden low key.

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makopp5 (☼Travelguide writer) says on Nov 7, 2009, 01:59:

makopp5 (☼Travelguide writer) says on Nov 7, 2009, 02:06:

whitewidow says on Nov 7, 2009, 02:17:

i hate haters and people who hide their identities.

I'm no doper! I just play one on TV.

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Robert Jorge says on Nov 7, 2009, 02:27:

Ok Makopp5, How much is import tax? How much is value added tax? How much is property tax? How much is income tax? How much is business gross profit tax? How much is rent? How much is interest on the loan used to buy your product? Add it all up. Good luck to anybody who wants to give it a shot. Hell, I run a business in the US and would love to relocate in Colombia, but I am not stupid.

If you have a successful business in Colombia, my hat is off to you. Good job!

What part of Germany are you from? My dad was born in Kirkel. My family lives in Zweibrucken, Homberg, Pirmasins, Eppelhiem, and Ludwigsaphin. (forgive me for my spelling)

"You can not take the barrio out of the girl you really can't." Oneforamillion

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jimbo67856 says on Nov 7, 2009, 02:31:

According to this site it's 78.7% of all business profit. I'm not saying it's true, just posting the link. http://www.doingbusiness.org/ExploreTopics/PayingTaxes/Details.aspx?ec...

Errors of opinion may be tolerated where reason is left free to combat it. ---- Thomas Jefferson

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makopp5 (☼Travelguide writer) says on Nov 7, 2009, 02:47:

makopp5 (☼Travelguide writer) says on Nov 7, 2009, 02:48:

jimbo67856 says on Nov 7, 2009, 02:54:

mak, I agree. I wasn't making a judgment, just offering a link b/c others were curious what the specific tax rate is.

Errors of opinion may be tolerated where reason is left free to combat it. ---- Thomas Jefferson

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Juepaje says on Nov 7, 2009, 03:00:

I hate living on the coast because I am too close to beautiful beaches. I hate that there are so many beautiful women in one country. I hate all of the beautiful green tropical landscapes. I hate the low cost of living and low taxes. I hate myself for living here and having too much fun with my beautiful Colombian wife. I hate going to my farm and making money. I hate being self-employed and miss writing monthly reports and sending daily reports to the main office. Most of all I love the Gringos who hate Colombia so much that they would never in a million years venture down here. If you don't like the banking system, move to Panama or don't use it. No one forces you to use a bank. Use an offshore bank and debit cards. You don't need to make as much money here as you do "up there". I came here with nothing but a few grand in my pocket and have done well and I know others who have done the same. I see opportunities all of the time to make money in Colombia. I hate this place. The pace of life is too easy. I'll probably never leave my little hell on earth.

Sic enim dilexit Deus mundum ut Filium suum unigenitum daret ut omnis qui credit in eum non pereat sed habeat vitam aeternam.

3 funny, 1 helpful.

makopp5 (☼Travelguide writer) says on Nov 7, 2009, 03:17:

Juepaje says on Nov 7, 2009, 03:29:

Agricultural.

Sic enim dilexit Deus mundum ut Filium suum unigenitum daret ut omnis qui credit in eum non pereat sed habeat vitam aeternam.

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dwmte7 says on Nov 7, 2009, 04:11:

what do i hate about colombia? cant think of a thing.

patriarch

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El Expatriado says on Nov 7, 2009, 04:21:

I don't hate nuttin. If I did , I wouldn't go there.

Haven't bin mugged yet though

No Place , person or culture is perfect. Iprefer not to whine.

I keep away from the ugly Americans, but some of the Colombianas like em cuz they buy them Tetas, Lipo and culu implants.

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El Expatriado says on Nov 7, 2009, 04:28:

Yeah, the Colombians sure hate it when you talk about violence and drug problems, but they sure like Tele Novelas that glorify it,Like El Capo, Regressa la Guaca,etc., all the violent noticias, and a lot of them have not so subtle hero worship for Pablo Escobar,allthough they won't admit it if you ask 'em directly.

Not that I hatet his. It's actually entertaining in an ironic way.

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johnny2009 says on Nov 7, 2009, 04:30:

Still the only thing that really grates me about Colombia is those bitches in Exito that tie the handles of my carrier bags together.

But I have come to learn that if you punch them hard enough they fuck off

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Desi1 (Moderator) (Trustee board) says on Nov 7, 2009, 04:47:

My pet peeve about Colombia is that it's too far away. They oughta move it closer.

A fronte praecipitium a tergo lupi

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Monpirri says on Nov 7, 2009, 05:15:

The voltiarepas!

"Anyone who still thinks that Colombia is not a gastronomical paradise needs to have their head examined." Darloup

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davidyamiga says on Nov 7, 2009, 05:25:

I dislike people who write and speak negatively about another country. There is no reason to "hate". You can live in the US, Europe, China, and there will be differences in how that country works and breathes. If you live in Colombia, live like a native and you will be fine. Adapt to the culture.

Otra vez en casa...Cali!

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roloenNJ says on Nov 7, 2009, 05:48:

I hate the following:
Banks
La pobresa and then seeing how much money the rich have
society trying to copy the American culture
Q las mujeres se vendan por plata
Many people are always lloking for a hand out ( Im sorry but I work for my money You can do the same)
Seeing little kids at the traffic lights selling and performing ( It gets me sad)
Finally, that many Colombianos even family will try to rip you off if one is not carefull

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wendell13 says on Nov 7, 2009, 06:05:

El Ex...you are exactly right about the fascination for the narcos.

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oneforyourmillion says on Nov 7, 2009, 06:11:

"you make a million dollars profit in Colombia legally, you might be able to keep $50,000 of it. It's ridiculous."


So what does that tell you about how to do business in Colombia? ;)

What do I hate? Macho assholes with guns. (Universal)

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emerson_wylde says on Nov 7, 2009, 06:28:

I hate that when people pay for their groceries in Exito (and elsewhere) they don't move down to the payment part of the counter so the next person can start unloading their merchandise for the cashier. Oh, and that everyone says "8 dias" to refer to a 7 day week, like "cada ocho dias" or "regresare en ocho dias". Well, I guess if thats all that I hate about the place -- thats pretty good.

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gamm2 (☼Travelguide writer) says on Nov 7, 2009, 06:32:

goin_south says on Nov 7, 2009, 06:36:

I hate it, when I have to leave

nothin I say is to be takn for my words, but rather for the words of Sailor Jerry.

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theflatline says on Nov 7, 2009, 06:56:

I hate when you go to a store to get something and a jackass salesmen does not know if they have it, even though you can see them, and he has to yell that to the lady behind the desk who is on the phone with her boyfriend who says wait a minute. Then he tells you, then he asks for the price, then he tells you they do not have any more but for full price you have the display model.

Or a store the size of a shoebox with five people working in it and no one asks to help you.

Legaleez for Complete Morons - A book for gringos in Colombia for who think they understand the nature of the law in a country where they cannot speak the language.

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Byron_Kostner says on Nov 7, 2009, 07:08:

Oh yeah, almost forgot... what's the deal with people not knowing how to form a single line?

Actions speak louder than words, but the self-righteous crusaders want to live by their own rules.

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kingfish5515 says on Nov 7, 2009, 07:13:

I shall break this up into 2 catagories, 1 Big things about colombia,,, and 2 personal pet peeves.....
1. Big thing. Lack of a post office or postal system. I cant see how Colombian business could even survive without sending statements or invoices prior to the advent of email or cell phones. How did people communicate personally before all had cell phones?

2. Personal peeve. It sad and pitiful that I am the only lonely gringo without a paisa novia.. I wish the colombian beauties would be nicer to fat old bald gingos in shorts and flowerey shirts and sandals walking around Lleras all day. I think I am going to cry....

But other than that Col is ok!!! KF

4 funny, 1 helpful.

panthdave says on Nov 7, 2009, 07:18:

Tax system,Banking System, and too much paperwork to get things done.

panthdave Miami

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theflatline says on Nov 7, 2009, 07:19:

Kingfish,

They used to have a postal system, Avianca ran it, and you can imagine how bad it was.

Legaleez for Complete Morons - A book for gringos in Colombia for who think they understand the nature of the law in a country where they cannot speak the language.

1 funny, 1 helpful.

johnny2009 says on Nov 7, 2009, 07:31:

Kingfish, if it is any consolation, I also don't have a Colombian girlfriend

That make you happier?

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Francijoe says on Nov 7, 2009, 08:08:

I love Colombia but I dont like that I got pushed out of line at the supermarket by a man...and I dont like in the states that there are clicks..Whites, balcks and latins...poor or rich people..

Hey cant we all get along.....

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whitewidow says on Nov 7, 2009, 08:08:

i hate people who complain........... and short macho types that act like chuck norris behind a keyboard.

I'm no doper! I just play one on TV.

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ERIKA7 says on Nov 7, 2009, 08:19:

I hate:
Government (so much corruption)
Bureaucracy
Banks
Customer service (lack of)
Weather in Cali, Bogota, Cartagena
Drivers
Soccer games (you may get killed by just going there)
gringo and Narcos worship (my cousin is a narco, of course super wealthy, everybody loves him, don’t get it)
violence and drug problems
Colombians in general don’t respect authorities, or laws (my bother is a police officer in Tulua)
feeling afraid of being mugged
poverty
homeless kids (so sad)
bad treatment to animals
sooooooo much prostitution ( so sad, its cool to be a prepago)
rudness
you cant trust no one there ( only my family)
I hate when people ask me for money, they think just because I live in US I am super wealthy.



I love being Colombian (for some weird reason it makes me more attractive to American people, I don’t get it) … there are really ugly women there,, all over Colombia and there really beautiful people here too. I have seem some guys posting this ugly girls pics here,, stating how hot they are,, some people have very low standards of beauty. O well.
I love empanadas, morcilla, manjar blanco, hiado encebollado.
I love my fun friends, they don’t worry about future or work work work (like my gringo friends) but just enjoy everyday with yor panas, doing just about nothing. Work to live, no live to work (love that)
Live goes slowly, there is not competition who gets the biggest yatch, biggest house,
Donde comen dos, comen 10, hahahaha. Love it!


Too much

"por muy bonita que sea, tambien se caga y se mea"

2 funny, 1 helpful.

ERIKA7 says on Nov 7, 2009, 08:19:

I hate gringos who think they know everything about Colombia,
Because they visited there a few times.

"por muy bonita que sea, tambien se caga y se mea"

1 funny, 1 helpful.

whitewidow says on Nov 7, 2009, 08:23:

i hate people

french poodles

and cab drivers that will not allow me to shut the car door

I'm no doper! I just play one on TV.

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ERIKA7 says on Nov 7, 2009, 08:23:

My friend got mugged twice last month in Poblado, sucks

"por muy bonita que sea, tambien se caga y se mea"

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johnny2009 says on Nov 7, 2009, 08:27:

Ignore my last comment, I just slipped on a half open doy pack of Fruco mayonesa in aisle 9 in Exito Chapinero. I skidded 20 metres right up to the olives and jalapeños and fell head first into some nice lady's tits.

I am going to meet her family tonight and she is moving in tomorrow.

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Brian858 says on Nov 7, 2009, 08:35:

Taxi and bus drivers. They would be shot in the United States for the shit they pull on you here! Stopping in the middle of the road to pickup or drop off passengers. Stopping traffic without a care in the world.

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Byron_Kostner says on Nov 7, 2009, 08:38:

ERIKA7,
Thank you for your honesty, great post.

I go out of my way to blend into Colombian society, but sometimes I get upset when people try to cut in line.

Actions speak louder than words, but the self-righteous crusaders want to live by their own rules.

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whitewidow says on Nov 7, 2009, 08:42:

jajajajajaja, johnny! hilarious.....

goodluck to the new, slightly greasy couple

I'm no doper! I just play one on TV.

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flynn flanagan says on Nov 7, 2009, 09:36:

Nepotism, the great deterrent to economic growth. It’s common in Latin America.

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Paisa/Calena/Luver says on Nov 7, 2009, 09:37:

I hate not having Mountain Dew nor White Castles... jajajajajaa

Or a good slice of New York Pizza or Chili Dog.. besides that,, I love everything about it..

oh... also people who tell you everything that you want to hear... not the truth.... thats freaking ridiculous..

"PAY ATTENTION! I wonder if that person knows that when we push the FUNNY button, its because we are reading something outrageous, trying to be cynical, derogatory, sarcastic and/or obnoxious!"

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onthemoon says on Nov 7, 2009, 09:45:

OH Johnny, was about to ask if i had a chance with you.... =(( jeje
Too late.

Love Happens...

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Cheers Terry says on Nov 7, 2009, 10:26:

That comment works on so many levels...

Cheers,
Terry

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ERIKA7 says on Nov 7, 2009, 10:33:

You are welcome Byron,

I don’t hate it but going party in Colombia, I don’t like it much,
The clubs are small and the DJs are not that good, they play old music, its just weird to me,
I don’t drink aguardiente, Ron or beer, so my friends look at me like I am a weird,
Bartenders in Colombia have no idea how to make fruity drinks (more what I like)

Once in mangos (supposedly best club in Colombia? It was all right, nothing special) I could get a votka cranberry, martiny or whatever, the bartender ended up getting me some orange juice and one of those tiny bottles of vodka, so I have to mix it myself, that was weird.

Few months ago in cali waiting for a friend at a bar at the palmetto mall, they had a big menu or drinks, I order a long island, she was having trouble mixing it or something, it took like 45 minutes for her to get it to me, the drink itself was HUGE, like a half litro, it was horrible, it has sooo much alcohol, I was so drunk at the second sip. All the other people around where getting bottles of aguardiente and taking turns to take shots, guacala!

I had some good margaritas in Unicentro tho.

The part I like about clubbing in Colombia is THERE ARE NOT a bunch of single guys around annoying all the girls (like in Miami clubs), because in my country we usually go out with a group, boyfriends cousins friends brothers (females and male always). The single girls by themselves are usualy prepagos (in my opinion)

"por muy bonita que sea, tambien se caga y se mea"

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ERIKA7 says on Nov 7, 2009, 10:34:

humm Simon B would be really mad at me,, hehehehe

"por muy bonita que sea, tambien se caga y se mea"

0 funny, 1 helpful.

Desi1 (Moderator) (Trustee board) says on Nov 7, 2009, 10:39:

Erikapotatoes, I presume?

A fronte praecipitium a tergo lupi

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onthemoon says on Nov 7, 2009, 10:41:

Really dont like when Colombians who hadnt had that much get gringo husband or find a cleanning job in the states and then they think they are the best because they have more money when they come visiting. =S
Pray to God i keep being the same if someday i have money.

Love Happens...

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Paisa/Calena/Luver says on Nov 7, 2009, 10:58:

"The single girls by themselves are usualy prepagos (in my opinion)"

So I guess single girls, cant get together, put their money together, buy a bottle and go to a club and have a good time, respectfully by themselves or else people like you will label them prepagos?
Damn I wonder where the good no creida girls are then.. jajajajaja lol

jajajajajaj JUSTOOO I have a project for you! jaajajajajja lol

"PAY ATTENTION! I wonder if that person knows that when we push the FUNNY button, its because we are reading something outrageous, trying to be cynical, derogatory, sarcastic and/or obnoxious!"

1 funny, 1 helpful.

ERIKA7 says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:01:

where can i get arepa con queso ( de las que se fritan en mantequilla) en Ft. lauderdale?

new in the area

"por muy bonita que sea, tambien se caga y se mea"

1 funny, 0 helpful.

onthemoon says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:04:

Good point paisa.
I meet my friends once in a while to do that. We get together to PREPAGUEAR. jejejej

Love Happens...

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Paisa/Calena/Luver says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:07:

There is a place on PEMBROKE rd right across from the CASINO.. I dont know the name, but it is all comida tipico de Colombia, supposedly very good and has a big Colombian flag flying in the front.. In Miami I like to go to Mi Colombia on 71st Miami Beach.. very good as well.

"PAY ATTENTION! I wonder if that person knows that when we push the FUNNY button, its because we are reading something outrageous, trying to be cynical, derogatory, sarcastic and/or obnoxious!"

1 funny, 0 helpful.

kat1 (Moderator) (Trustee board) (☼Travelguide writer) says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:08:

Saltador says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:09:

Minor peeves:

1. Lines in banks. Takes you 45 minutes to do what I could do in 5 minutes in the states.
2. Taxistas that rob you. Most are cool, but every now and then you run into one that thinks they can rob you blind because you're a gringo. I've had guys on two occasions on a 5-8000 pesos fare give me back 5000 change from a 20,000 peso note and then argue and refuse to give me my proper change. I argue for a while then say fluck it, it ain't worth it, but it's BS.
3. People telling you they are going to do something then they don't. This is frustrating when you ask a business associate to do something, they say they will, then never do it. Or say they will pass some information on to you by email, then the email never comes. Or they say, sure, just call me, then they never answer the phone. Christ, if you don't want to do it, just f-in say so, I'll find someone that will.
4. Sending your novia to the exito to pick up some Coronas, she comes home with some white sticky stuff on her chest and tells you she's leaving you for some little guy that's hung like a burro.

5 funny, 1 helpful.

oneforyourmillion says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:19:

onthemoon
Money changes you whether you want it to or not. Best to just be content where you are in life. ;)

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onthemoon says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:29:

Millionthing, Money must change your environment, the things you have and things you can do but never the way you are, your scent, remember money doesnt last forever and at the end we all go to the same place. =)) i agree with you, be happy with what you have now =P

Love Happens...

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ERIKA7 says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:34:

Thanks Paisa,

But where that is, in Pembroke Pines, what casino? Hard Rock or the Isla?
I dont know the area well.
there 2 Colombian restaurants on 441 in Boca Raton, but they only have
plain arepas, those are not that good but they good bandeja paisa. humm,




There is a place on PEMBROKE rd right across from the CASINO.. I dont know the name, but it is all comida tipico de Colombia, supposedly very good and has a big Colombian flag flying in the front.. In Miami I like to go to Mi Colombia on 71st Miami Beach.. very good as well.

"por muy bonita que sea, tambien se caga y se mea"

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Paisa/Calena/Luver says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:41:

No Pembroke road off of 95 going south.. Across from Mardi Gras Casino.. Hard Rock is off of Sheridan and 441...ill see if I can get the name for you because I want you to call first.

"PAY ATTENTION! I wonder if that person knows that when we push the FUNNY button, its because we are reading something outrageous, trying to be cynical, derogatory, sarcastic and/or obnoxious!"

1 funny, 0 helpful.

ERIKA7 says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:43:

Owesome,tnx

"por muy bonita que sea, tambien se caga y se mea"

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CakeDesigner-wannabe says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:44:

MY EX-PROMETIDA - Lizna Cortez

2 funny, 0 helpful.

onthemoon says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:47:

where, where!!

Love Happens...

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johnny2009 says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:51:

CakeDesigner-wannabe says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:44 (today): flag

MY EX-PROMETIDA - Lizna Cortez

¿?¿?¿?¿?¿?¿

Ahh could be a coincidence, but is she by any chance

a) about 5'4"
b) brunette
c) mayonaisy tits
d) doesn't look where she is going
e) saltador's novia?

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ERIKA7 says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:52:

I am hungry and bored,,,
I would usually be wit my boyfriend doing something fun,
but he dumped me halloween day ,,, o well ..

: P

"por muy bonita que sea, tambien se caga y se mea"

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ERIKA7 says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:53:

I want pumpkin cake, egg nog,,

Cake ,,how many prometidas you had? omg!

"por muy bonita que sea, tambien se caga y se mea"

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johnny2009 says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:54:

ERIKA please stay on topic

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ERIKA7 says on Nov 7, 2009, 11:57:

lol.... estas loco : P

"por muy bonita que sea, tambien se caga y se mea"

1 funny, 0 helpful.

davidyamiga says on Nov 7, 2009, 12:03:

Erika...There is a colombian restaurant on sample road, south of 441. El Balcon de Las Americas. Much better than the restaurants on 441 in Boca. The telephone number is 954-346-4590

Otra vez en casa...Cali!

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Paisa/Calena/Luver says on Nov 7, 2009, 12:13:

Went to MAMA JUANAS in Coral Gables last weekend... great high end Latino Crowd, danced to salsa y merrengue all night long and didnt here ONE reggaeton song!! yippee!!!

http://www.mamajuanacafefl.com/

"PAY ATTENTION! I wonder if that person knows that when we push the FUNNY button, its because we are reading something outrageous, trying to be cynical, derogatory, sarcastic and/or obnoxious!"

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ERIKA7 says on Nov 7, 2009, 12:22:

Thanks David,
that one is not too far away,
i will check it out today

"por muy bonita que sea, tambien se caga y se mea"

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whitewidow says on Nov 7, 2009, 12:26:

mama juanas aint got chit on mari juanas!

I'm no doper! I just play one on TV.

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Saltador says on Nov 7, 2009, 12:27:

Worst part was that she "forgot" my coronas. Perra!
Now I need to get off my fat ass, put on my socks and sandals, and get my own beer...
Good luck Johnny. She's fun but her Mom has some medical issues.

1 funny, 0 helpful.

Byron_Kostner says on Nov 7, 2009, 12:35:

Almost forgot, I HATE it when Colombians blame the victim for "giving papaya" like it was their fault for getting rob. I am so sick of this backwards mentality!

Actions speak louder than words, but the self-righteous crusaders want to live by their own rules.

1 funny, 1 helpful.

kenblanquito says on Nov 7, 2009, 12:44:

The noise in Medellin and the lack of control by the authorities; the police either have no power over it or are too lazy to do anything about it. There are many occasions when I have known a police station to be swarming with police inside but to actually make them DO something about a nuisance neighbour who is taking the piss with high volumes very late at night is a very hard job.
The pollution in the cities, whether it be by vehicles or industry.
Transito seems content to watch numerous traffic offences right under their eyes and do nothing, unless a minimum monthly salary fine is applicable. The average driving quality is horrendous.
The archaic systems of banks and other organisations which makes things so difficult for foreigners, especially if we wish to live or work here. DAS does nobody any favours and don't they love the power that they hold over you.
The corruption and the fact that you need to know the right people to have a chance of achieving anything significant apart from teaching English.
Time-keeping and spontaneous last-minute cancellations. Drop ins without warnings but we have learnt to not open the door now. They soon get the hang of it, especially during the rainy season.
Bank queues.
Those things aside, I love it here and I would only leave if I was forced out.

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tropicalshirt says on Nov 7, 2009, 12:53:

Shopping centres!

I hate 'em!

How the fok can you go out to a shopping centre???

I went to one in Cali with about 1000 security guards. They all ended up following me! JAJAJAJA!!!

One button holed me and said are you waiting?

I told him to fok off!

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jimbo67856 says on Nov 7, 2009, 12:55:

tropicalshirt says on Nov 7, 2009, 12:53 (today): flag

"One button holed me"

Sounds painful. ;)

Errors of opinion may be tolerated where reason is left free to combat it. ---- Thomas Jefferson

1 funny, 2 helpful.

Desi1 (Moderator) (Trustee board) says on Nov 7, 2009, 12:56:

Byron, I agree with you 100% about the law of papaya. It's thug mentality.

A fronte praecipitium a tergo lupi

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tropicalshirt says on Nov 7, 2009, 13:06:

I hate the roads too!

up, up, up, up, up, up....
down, down, down, down, down, down....
(repeat 100 times)

La costa is much better, flat!

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tropicalshirt says on Nov 7, 2009, 13:13:

Seriously, when travelling between cities I hate to see how people live on the smallest edges of land on these mountain roads imaginable. The worst shanty towns in Brazil are sometimes no more than bin bags and sticks and worse than anything else I have seen, but I've never seen people living on tiny plots of land on top of huge precipes as I did all along major roads in Colombia.

Same problem of land ownership and in Colombia the displaced.

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Desi1 (Moderator) (Trustee board) says on Nov 7, 2009, 13:23:

The Colombian society has a feudal structure, overlaced by ultracapitalist neoliberal economy that will only broaden the gulf between the rich and the poor.

A fronte praecipitium a tergo lupi

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coastalad says on Nov 7, 2009, 13:38:

Fat Fanny and friends

always avoiding white picket fences

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webmanco says on Nov 7, 2009, 13:52:

Having Paleolitico and OnTheMoon, moons away.

No hay extremo cierto o verdadero, porque los extremos opacan, enruedan, (lavan cerebros) verdades. Yotas

2 funny, 1 helpful.

johnny2009 says on Nov 7, 2009, 13:53:

Stop sulking Webmanco, I am NOT buying you that new dress so get over it already

2 funny, 1 helpful.

kat1 (Moderator) (Trustee board) (☼Travelguide writer) says on Nov 7, 2009, 14:03:

jimmymcc says on Nov 7, 2009, 17:16:

The way Colombians push their way in front of you when you are being served in a shop, etc, they just come in and talk over you,RUDE
And, No BOG ROLL, in the tiolets,

1 funny, 0 helpful.

Panama says on Nov 7, 2009, 19:36:

Badges?? We don't need no Stinking Badges.!! We are Ugly Americans...............

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La_Huella says on Nov 7, 2009, 19:40:

The only thing that pisses me off here no end are the banks.Everything else is great.

Feudal structure???? BULL SHIT! You can make as much money as you want here, there just isn't any room for losers.

1 funny, 1 helpful.

Lisa Zee says on Nov 7, 2009, 19:50:

In big cities I dislike:
Loud music everywhere
Traffic
Pollution
Drunks
Smoking

Vive la vida y deja vivir!.

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Learnersrealm says on Nov 7, 2009, 20:24:

I have always thought Bogota Colombia is about 30 years behind melbourne. I do feel like i am living in a time before i was born. Why do I feel this....because the level of customer service, technology and general efficiency is so bad. I have a love hate relationship with this place. It can go from day to day. The only that carries it is the hope and passion of colombianos. But i am in no doubt after living here for 6 months *and only my opinion* the colombian women are the best in the world, incredibly diligent and dedicated....the opposite i think is true of the men. They are what caused all the mess thats here which the women strive to correct. Its amazing to be part of this.

"The Spanish moon is rising on the hill But my heart is a-tellin' me I love ya still" - Bob Dylan (Abandoned Love)

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goin_south says on Nov 7, 2009, 20:52:

I think we need to start a NEW THREAD for our beloved (?) moderator, kat1:

"What do you Hate about the United Kingdom?"

nothin I say is to be takn for my words, but rather for the words of Sailor Jerry.

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Robert Jorge says on Nov 7, 2009, 20:59:

I just wish 30 years ago was older than me.

"You can not take the barrio out of the girl you really can't." Oneforamillion

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goin_south says on Nov 7, 2009, 21:02:

...but, can you take the girl outta de barrio?

Hey, RJ......
you're starting to write like me (and, la_campina)......
and, if you keep that up, no one will understand anything you say.

nothin I say is to be takn for my words, but rather for the words of Sailor Jerry.

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christobeldawg says on Nov 7, 2009, 22:08:

I hate nothing about Colombia. There are a few annoyances, as mentioned, but overall, I love the place, and they are on the leading edge of being something so much more. There are so many wonderful things about that country, but ok, I guess they could lose their being so defensive about their image problem in the world. I guess I could do better on that, as far as my own worries over others' opinions of me.

traveling hopefully is always better than arriving

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goin_south says on Nov 7, 2009, 22:25:

hey Dawg, ... nothing about "colombiana jealousy/insecurity" ?

nothin I say is to be takn for my words, but rather for the words of Sailor Jerry.

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christobeldawg says on Nov 7, 2009, 22:56:

oh yeah, that too. Ok, I hate that.

traveling hopefully is always better than arriving

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Robert Jorge says on Nov 8, 2009, 01:33:

GS, you lost me. My tagline though is a quote from GIB - as noted.

"You can not take the barrio out of the girl you really can't." Oneforamillion

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El Expatriado says on Nov 8, 2009, 02:22:

Nothing wrong with Colombia. You should try Nigeria. Get robbed at gun point on a weekly basis. Raped monthly. (and I only know men who go there in the Oil Patch).

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Robert Jorge says on Nov 8, 2009, 03:02:

You couldn't pay me enough money to go to Nigeria. I like adventure, but F that place. F that whole continent. I have no desire to ever visit Africa. I'll stick to watching the Travel Channel and Discovery. I think Douglas spent time there (dmwte) and he never had anything good to say about it either.

"You can not take the barrio out of the girl you really can't." Oneforamillion

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tropicalshirt says on Nov 8, 2009, 03:43:

I hate how the best dancers I have seen in the World are not recognized outside of the Cali Salsa festival. You see the garotas do the Samba in Brazil or the homens do the Caopoeira like a dance, and the Cubans do salsa tradional, but you do not see tricks like these calenos do anywhere else...

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CakeDesigner-wannabe says on Nov 8, 2009, 04:13:

Johnny - lol

MY EX-PROMETIDA - Lizna Cortez

¿?¿?¿?¿?¿?¿

Ahh could be a coincidence, but is she by any chance

a) about 5'4"
b) brunette
c) mayonaisy tits
d) doesn't look where she is going
e) saltador's novia?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Was she your ex also? lol

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roloenNJ says on Nov 8, 2009, 04:37:

Onthemoon Said

Really dont like when Colombians who hadnt had that much get gringo husband or find a cleanning job in the states and then they think they are the best because they have more money when they come visiting. =S

I see women like this everytime I go to the airport with a bunch of make up, tight jeans, high hills, sunglasses, and talking about money money money, or and like 20 bags, Flat screen T.V. etc, IDK why Colombians change so much when they arrived to the states ( i have this and that) who cares .......Especially the Avianca flight NYC to Medellin then Cali !!!!!!!!!

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Byron_Kostner says on Nov 8, 2009, 05:38:

"I see women like this everytime I go to the airport with a bunch of make up, tight jeans, high hills, sunglasses, and talking about money money money"

Haha, it seems like Colombia only exports the skanks to the US. I see these skanks at the airport all the time, sometimes with their gringo novios carrying the bags.

I hate it when a Colombian asks you straight out to buy them a laptop, among other expensive items, like they were asking you to buy them a piece of gum.

Actions speak louder than words, but the self-righteous crusaders want to live by their own rules.

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roloenNJ says on Nov 8, 2009, 06:01:

my comment is just personal from what i have seeing in the airport in my past couple of trips. However, there are many Colombianas who also dress up in a very respectfull way. If Colombia exports skanks to the US I ask who is to blame HER or her BF aka Husband for bringing her into the states without even knowing what type of person she was going to be.

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davidyamiga says on Nov 8, 2009, 06:33:

MAN! Never have seen so much hatred or dislikes. But that is what makes the world go around...

Otra vez en casa...Cali!

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Byron_Kostner says on Nov 8, 2009, 08:22:

roloenNJ,
You are right. The desperate gringo is to blame for the skanks, agree that there are many good respectable Colombian women in the US, they just don't stick out as much those with a "bunch of make up, tight jeans, high hills, sunglasses, and talking about money money money."

Actions speak louder than words, but the self-righteous crusaders want to live by their own rules.

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jimbo67856 says on Nov 8, 2009, 10:10:

"If Colombia exports skanks to the US I ask who is to blame HER or her BF aka Husband for bringing her into the states without even knowing what type of person she was going to be."

Dude truer words were never spoken.

Errors of opinion may be tolerated where reason is left free to combat it. ---- Thomas Jefferson

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theflatline says on Nov 8, 2009, 14:33:

To be honest, as a Colombian(who also pays one on TV) the majority of my fellow North Americans who come down here to get wives, get some of the skankiest, ugliest, oldest, tore up, road whores I have ever seen. And then put them on a pedestal.

And the kicker is the women usually do not even have pleasant personalities or any redeeming qualities.

Kostner,

The gringo is not too blame for the skank, I have been wandering around Colombia a lot longer than you have and skanks have always been around here. Colombians have kept their mosas for years looking like whores.

What I do not understand is Hooters in Colombia, they have bad food in the States, and the pics I have seen of the Hooters Girls in Colombia are even skankier than the US hooters.

Legaleez for Complete Morons - A book for gringos in Colombia for who think they understand the nature of the law in a country where they cannot speak the language.

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goin_south says on Nov 8, 2009, 22:47:

flatline, I have a similar sentiment (why??? Hooters' Bars in Colombia?), because unless my eyes continue to deceive me, it is true, what a fellow gringo once said to me about five years ago now, before my first trip to Colombia, and ....it always appears to me, that :

......... "God Made Tits in Colombia."

Now, ... not that all colombianas are so well endowed, but neither can the plastic surgeons possibly do that many boob jobs,... nor! could that many low-lying colombianas afford one!

nothin I say is to be takn for my words, but rather for the words of Sailor Jerry.

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El Expatriado says on Nov 9, 2009, 03:16:

OK, I love Canada, but I think I'll retire in Colombia, here's why:

Canada- Climate- Shitty- Colombia- Great
Canada - Medicare Shitty, cost Free? (or cheap),Colombia, Medical care good, cost reasonable.
Canada Dental care good, cost freakin expensive. Colombia, dental care good, cost 25-30% of Canada
Canada, Meat, good, cost expensive. Colombia, meet good (evemn better) cost 30% of Canada
Canada Restaurants- good, but expensive. Colombia, Restuarants OK (not as much vareity as Canada) but costs 25% -30% of Canada.
Beer Canada very good, Colombia good (no dark beer though) but costs 20% of Canada.
Housing - both places good, Colombia costs 20-30% of Canada
Culture- and wamness of people- Canada, cold and non-existant- Colombia warm, vibrant and passionate
Scenery, flora and fauna-both beautiful and stunning, but Colombia has more vareity
Mountains- Canada better, but I can go on vacation for 6 weeks a year.
Skiing- Canada infinitely better, but I can go on vacation for 6 weeks a year.
WOMEN- JA.JA.jA.jA... SAY NO MORE!
Political correct bullshit- Canada- worst place in the world, Colombia, just fine (although it even offends me a bit sometimes)
Danger/Security- OK Canada wins one here. But it is getting worse, and I think the petty theft must be just as bad as Colombia. I have been ripped off (that is, in the strictest, literal sense of the word ) much more frequently in Canada recently than in Colombia.

I've traveled and been in over 40 countries all over the world, and lived in half a dozen of them. I have very little bad to say about Colombia. But then,I haven't been robbed at knife (or gun) point yet (hopefully it s more than just good luck-toca la madera)

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makopp5 (☼Travelguide writer) says on Nov 9, 2009, 03:31:

El Expatriado says on Nov 9, 2009, 04:01:

Sorry Makopp , I am von of Zem "Girly Men".

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La_Huella says on Nov 9, 2009, 05:13:

Expatriado... There are microbreweries here that make dark beer, so that's one less item on your list to worry about.

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theflatline says on Nov 9, 2009, 05:21:

Going South,

They say that beautiful women are not born in Cali, they are made there.

Legaleez for Complete Morons - A book for gringos in Colombia for who think they understand the nature of the law in a country where they cannot speak the language.

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oneforyourmillion says on Nov 9, 2009, 05:26:

I don't know about some of you guys. You seem to be confusing your whores with Colombianas and to that all I can say is you need to set back, sip your beer and watch because there is a big difference.

For one in 7 years I have never one time had a Colombiana that I dated who asked me for anything like that, really not asked me for a thing. Now if you hang out with prepagos well then it is to be expected. But don't confuse the game your playing.

That is my complaint with visiting gringos. If you want to chase whores? Go ahead and do it I don't care but could you please stop confusing the prepagos and whores with good girls or with all the girls or lumping them all together. I know they look like good girls but they are very very easy to spot when they open their mouth or you just watch them for about five minutes without being completely drunk off your butt.

I have my issues with Colombianas and well most of it can be accounted to cultural differences and some of it is my own fault but I HAVE NEVER cufused the whores with the good girls. Am I something special? NO! But I do have my eyes open and my mouth shut when I don't know something like a new culture.....

NOTE: Prepagos are the ones asking you for laptops....

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oneforyourmillion says on Nov 9, 2009, 05:42:

So what do I hate? Tourists who come to Colombioa and dive into it like it is their own little playground without a thought of the culture, the people or how their actions reflect on their country.

Like I said a Colombian man does not confuse the Colombiana with the whores. This makes people mad when it is done by anyone let alone gringos. So I guess that is the big one. Oh and people in Colombia when speaking in public think it is fashionable to trash gringos on the assumption that we are all like that. It is the hypocracy of it that bothers me. But as well the gringos that contribute to it.

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excavator59 says on Nov 9, 2009, 20:00:

The low quality of driving f*****g taxis,f*****g buses pricks in 4X4 who think they own the road ,pushing in in queues .

Life is like a Pubic Hair on a Toilet Seat (Sooner or Later you get Pissed Off)

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christobeldawg says on Nov 9, 2009, 21:09:

Losers attract losers, wherever they go. Nothing changes because someone tries to fantasize a totally different outcome in a different place.
Having said that, if one is a decent and decent looking guy, from the US, he might could do better in Colombia, as far as finding a keeper, but it will involve much more than a quick trip or two. He will have to get to know the culture, the language, the woman, her family, and spend alot of time there, and then, yeah, there are possibly better possibilities than in the US.
Forget doing it quick, on a dime. That very seldom works, and will cost the guy who chooses to do that alot of cash and heartache, most of the time.

traveling hopefully is always better than arriving

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MitchAlvarez says on Nov 10, 2009, 00:10:

i hate that its not just a thirty minute drive or less from nyc. id like to drive to medellin every weekend. :(

0 funny, 1 helpful.

El Expatriado says on Nov 10, 2009, 02:48:

This guy saw this really beautiful women in a bar (Casa de Ceveza) in Cali.. "Hi there, what's your name?" he asked.

"Maria" . she answered.

"What do you do for a living?"he asked.

"I am studying to be a heart surgeon. I come from an estrado 6 family, am a virgen, go to church every Sunday, do charity work with the poor. I am just waiting for my father, he's in the wash room, and we're having a drink together to celbrate my acceptance into medical school".

"What do you do for a living?" she asked.

"I am a hollywood movie producer."

"Oh really,!! "she said, "Whatever are you doing in Cali?"

"I am looking for new talent for my movie. You look like you might be a perfect, fit, a young, beautiful , intellegent, innocent Latina."

"Oh really, she said, tell me about the role!"

"Well you have to do a love scene with Brad Pitt. But it is a very explicit movie, and you actually hae to have Sex with him. But the salary for you is $75,000".

"Well, I am a virgen, and maybe it is a sin, but Brad Pitt is georgeous, and That $75,000 could go a long way to pay for my medical school in the US. I'll do it".

"Okay,I have another proposition for you."

"What is that?" She asked.

"Will you have sex with me for $100 and a pair of jeans from Studio F?"

"No way, what do you think I am, a Puta or prepago?"

"Maria, we have already established that fact, we are just negotiating the price".

And so it goes.

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oneforyourmillion says on Nov 10, 2009, 04:19:

El Ex I just wish we could stand all the girls in line, ask them the question and then the ones who accepted get a tatoo on their forhead.... Life would be so much easier than taking a year or two to find out what you have.....

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