Don't Visit Colombia if...

utopiacowboy says on Mar 17, 2005, 08:19:

How about if we are gringo losers who just want easy sex? Can we come then?

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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Albatross says on Mar 17, 2005, 08:20:

;) C'mon... sounds like a regular guy to me, 'cept he doesn't drink enough...

“Democracy - a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance." - H.L. Mencken

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fzrdan says on Mar 17, 2005, 08:28:

- If you just want a warm and cheap place to spend winter
- If you just want to lay around in a hammock and do nothing

What is wrong with these two? So someone living in someplace like Canada can't go somewhere warm for the winter, lounge around and do nothing? A person has to get up and do things just because they are in Colombia? Maybe you are justified in your anger on the other points, but those two are just plain stupid.

If he was so bad why did you let him stay in your house for three months???????????

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elmodefoque says on Mar 17, 2005, 08:41:

hey utopia, how about easy and cheap sex under the influence of excellent cheap drugs and booze.

I'll get there, when I get there!

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utopiacowboy says on Mar 17, 2005, 08:52:

Cuidado, Elmo. I don't think he's going to let you stay at his house. Too much noise from all the squealing.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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miamimike says on Mar 17, 2005, 08:58:

Affects many of us..... Sadly this type of Visiter from the US gives us all a Black Eye and some , not all,display this type of Behavior penned by the OP(ricocolombia). A bad reputation is so hard to live down; once the damage is done by one if affects 100, deserving or underserving. For the most part, I try and avoid other Gringos when I travel as I want to focus on the native culture and Langauge. If I wanted to associate with a group of Americans, why leave the US?

On Sept 17, 2008: Senator John McCain said, as he had many times before, that he believed the fundamentals of the economy were "strong."Hours later he backpedaled, explaining that he had meant that American workers were Strong.

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adela says on Mar 17, 2005, 09:46:

Ricolombia:

I guess your list must be the first part of the PBH Colombian guide for foreigner visitors! Thank you, I absolutely agree with you. I have my own experiences with foreigners in the past, most about these parts:

-If you have no interest in Colombia's culture


- If you feel culturally superior and like to look down your nose at other cultures
- If you have no tolerance for the eccentricities of other cultures, i.e. Colombians love to talk!(yes!!!!!!)
- If you are homophobic, racist and sexist
- If you are cheap
- If you are cheap
- Repeat, if you are cheap (yes!)
- If you want to take advantage of the genorosity of others (yes!)
- If your vocabulary doesn't include the words "thank you" (yes!)
- If you prefer to mock a culture rather than learn about it

Thanks Ricolombia! ( by the way Elmo, I add this point
-if your idea of Colombia is having sex and get cheap drugs... )

Màs fe, màs abrazos, màs besos, màs disculpas, màs visitas a nuestros amigos antiguos nos haràn màs plenos cada vez.

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adela says on Mar 17, 2005, 09:49:

For Desi
where are you been lately? Let us know what do you think about the "don't come to Colombia if' List"....

Waiting for you...

(where are you, Kat, Mrs Gomez, Adrim,Clalorena..oh..Mariángela? )

Màs fe, màs abrazos, màs besos, màs disculpas, màs visitas a nuestros amigos antiguos nos haràn màs plenos cada vez.

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ARMacleod says on Mar 17, 2005, 10:08:

THREE MONTHS? Sorry, But I have little sympathy for you.

Surely to god you could have known what kind of low life this person was after three minutes, or at the least after a few hours, days? MONTHS, It took you months to find this out?

You should have kicked his sorry backside out of your pad long before he left.

Pax vobiscum

The brain is like a parachute, it only functions correctly when it is open. Pax vobiscum.

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Miguel says on Mar 17, 2005, 10:14:

Hmm Sorry about your bad experience, but if this person was such a jackass, you should have picked up on it in three weeks, three days, three hours, or three minutes.
By the way, Elmo has permission to stay at my house anytime he wants. I work nights, when the squealing most likely will take place, and he will be hung over and passed out while I am home during the day. Weekends probably would sound like a cross between Carnaval and Super Bowl Sunday.
Seriously, Rico, that's a drag. Should you decide to rent your room out again, you now know you need to screen, big time.

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Desideria (Moderator) says on Mar 17, 2005, 10:23:

let me think about that one for a while.
"Don't come to Colombia if..."
1. You have to bring your own vitamins with you.
2. If you have no interest in learning Spanish/ and/ or Colombian culture.
3. If you're just a sex tourist, a pedophil, a drughead or have a criminal mind.
4. If you think that you have traveled in "worse" places and believe you can outsmart any local, meaning that you don't need to listen to anybody for advice on your safety.
5. If you feel yourself culturally superior, smarter, more handsome, more "anything" that the locals...you'll make few reliable friends.
6. If you think that because of the color of your passport you should get a v.i.p treatment in any "third world" country.
7. I f you feel that you can't take criticism or are easily offended by people who don't share your points of view.
8. If you're lazy, cheap, ungrateful, egotistical s.o.b stay home...I'm sure nobody appreciates you there either, but at least they are used to you.
9. If you have racist, sexist or otherwise undeveloped mind.
10. If you don't have a return ticket or money to buy a return ticket as it often happens that visitors tend to outstay their welcome...

I'm sure I could think of a few other categories too, but let's start with these.

Cheers,
Desi

"When shall we three meet again? In thunder, lightning, or in rain?"(First Witch in Macbeth)

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ARMacleod says on Mar 17, 2005, 10:39:

Desi If you exclude all in your list I think that the tourism business will collapse completely.

I will be the only person there.

On the other hand, that may be a bad thing, 'they' will only have me to pick on?

Bol*****. let them go in, but keep an eye on them. Remember it is only low life who are attracted to low life so it should be easier to keep tabs on them? or is that too simplistic?

Being of unsound mind and dubious disposition, I cannot be held legally liable for any indiscretions."¡El diablo me hizo hacerlo!" But don't worry, be happy. Auf wiedersehen.

The brain is like a parachute, it only functions correctly when it is open. Pax vobiscum.

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Miguel says on Mar 17, 2005, 10:43:

¿QUE?¿Vitaminas? That was your first comment? Where was the advice to not buy a guayaberra! The last and most boring thing I would want to do is waste my time and money buying vitamins while in Colombia!
The rest of your comments I agree with!

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fzrdan says on Mar 17, 2005, 10:47:

I don't understand the lazy issue. A person is only in Colombia for a few days, weeks, months...whatever. He/she has no intention of living there, just taking time to relax and recharge the batteries. What the heck is wrong with that person sitting around and doing nothing? I don't get it. The guy is supposed to go out and get a job or help poor folks build a school?

I think my next trip to Colombia will include a few days in Cartagena or Santa Marta and it is a safe bet that I will sit around on the beach and do nothing. I guess I shouldn't be visiting Colombia. I am so lazy I don't know how I keep my job. Sitting around doing nothing on vacation.

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elmodefoque says on Mar 17, 2005, 10:50:

desi, i agree with all the above except for that number 3.

I'll get there, when I get there!

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Desideria (Moderator) says on Mar 17, 2005, 10:54:

easy frzdan, that was only meant "lazy" as a lazy houseguest.

Miguel...yes, I forgot the guayaberas...but it's only bad taste, and that's not a crime. The vitamins was the first thing that came into my mind; if you have to bring half a suitcase packed with vitamins you should really, really stay home. Colombian food is rich in vitamins and the sun shines every day...why should you bother? In general, I meant that if you're overly anxious about your health there's no better place than home.

James. I was thinking about you when I wrote the above post...

Cheers,
Desi

"When shall we three meet again? In thunder, lightning, or in rain?"(First Witch in Macbeth)

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utopiacowboy says on Mar 17, 2005, 10:58:

The whole idea of excluding anyone from visitng Colombia based on some list is complete nonsense. Better off letting any jerk visit. Who knows, the experience might change them.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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Albatross says on Mar 17, 2005, 10:59:

Don't visit The United States if... On one hand this is one of the more entertaining posts I’ve read at PBH.

On the other hand, it's trivial.

The U.S., Europe and any other country that accepts large numbers of immigrants has to deal with undesirable visitors every minute. Every day vast numbers of people enter the United States with absolutely no interest in learning from or contributing to our culture, but with the sole intent of sucking as much out of our system as humanly possible.

If some Colombianos don't like the “class” of visitors their country receives, they should at least be thankful that there aren't many of them and that they're not looking for buildings to bomb...

“Democracy - a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance." - H.L. Mencken

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caslug says on Mar 17, 2005, 10:59:

rico, r u a machoist?.. Why put up with a houseguest that is that bad for THREEE MONTHS? Even if he/she prepaid the rent, just give them 2 weeks notice and boot'em out.

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fzrdan says on Mar 17, 2005, 10:59:

desi Well, I will go back to the last comment in my first post. Why let the person stay so long if all these problems exist?

Anyway, like jamesvh said, if all these rules were followed the number of tourists would drop by a large number. Maybe a good thing...

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Miguel says on Mar 17, 2005, 11:01:

Desi It's just easier to bring vitamins (and a toothbrush) than to waste time buying them there. And half a suitcase? Try one small bottle. And if I was over anxious about my health, I would not travel to Colombia!

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Scalestick says on Mar 17, 2005, 11:04:

Bad apple/unwanted guess For all those slagging ricolombia for not kicking his "guest?" out sooner, perhaps he paid in advance or Rico is too nice a guy to kick his sorry ass out. Either way, it's a shame that a bad apple may ruin it for all. Hopefully faith will be restored and all will return to normal. Obviously this person lied about their intentions.
fzrdan, with all due repect would you want someone loungind around your place doing nothing for three months, like an unwanted house guest or relatine? Just because someone pays their way doesn't make it a comfortable situation. Furthermore, I am from canada and while it is true people like to escape the winter blues, most people I know travel to learn from other cultures, otherewise they head to Cancun or Club-Med-it, Why travel if you aren't going to get out and enjoy what the place has to offer? Just my thoughts.
Anyway, Ricolombia was polite enough to email and explain the situation, after I contacted them to ask about a stay. The Pine Tree was recommended but not site where I could contact them. Can anyone help out here or recommend some other good hostals or hotels in that area or other places around Colombia, I'll be there for six weeks at the end of June; escaping from that infamous Canadian summer heat wave.

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Desideria (Moderator) says on Mar 17, 2005, 11:08:

Miguelin I wasn't thinking about you when I wrote "overly anxious". Looking at the company you keep in Colombia (excluding your GF, of course), elmose, oldgringuito etc. I see that you're not worried about your health, not a least bit.
Cheers,
Desi
(frzdan, I don't know, maybe it's just hard to say "get out" to somebody you've allowed in your home.)

"When shall we three meet again? In thunder, lightning, or in rain?"(First Witch in Macbeth)

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Scalestick says on Mar 17, 2005, 11:10:

ps I did try to find The Pine Tree on line, but no luck.
(sorry about the spelling mistakes in previous post)

Gracias

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vladimiro says on Mar 17, 2005, 11:12:

And no spoilt brats please:) I would add don't go to Colombia if you're too spoilt to put up with the inconveniences commonly found in third world countries.

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Scalestick says on Mar 17, 2005, 11:14:

Platypus Anyone know why the email address given online: platypushotel at yahoo.com doesn't work?

Gracias

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utopiacowboy says on Mar 17, 2005, 11:15:

The thing that is so absurd about this is it is something we've been through before. Colombia hardly gets any "true" tourists anyway except in a few areas like Cartagena.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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Miguel says on Mar 17, 2005, 11:15:

Pero... I have never met oldgringo (que lastima), I work out 5 days a week, including when in Colombia, and that helps me maintain the ability to party with Elmo y su posse! Time to take my vitamins with a cuba libre and go to mi cama...Prefiero irme a "La Kama" en Curramba. Hasta la proxima!

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fzrdan says on Mar 17, 2005, 11:19:

I understand it may be difficult to kick someone out, but if you are going to accept strangers into your house, you should be prepared for the bad apples. Also, if you don't have what it takes to kick someone out of your own house, then you probably shouldn't be accepting them in the first place.

Scalestick
"fzrdan, with all due repect would you want someone loungind around your place doing nothing for three months, like an unwanted house guest or relatine?"

Nope, that is why I wouldn't allow some stranger to stay in my house. Was it made clear to this person that lounging around all day everyday was not desirable? No? Ok, then it is your own fault.

A complete stranger and a relative are not even comparable. They can both be bad apples but of course you are going to be less likely to kick a relative out than some stranger.

And as far as the 'prepaid' thing goes, was there a contract signed? Unlikely. Refund what you need to and make sure the door hits him in the ass on the way out.

Moral of the story??? Don't allow strangers to stay in your house if:
You don't have rules that everyone understands.
You don't have the gonads to boot their rude, lazy ass out.

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miamimike says on Mar 17, 2005, 11:34:

Sometimes Colombians are too Polite They would tolerate a houseguest like this where as we would give them the BOOT in a day or two and toss there rent money out behind them. I evicted a guy out of a Rooming House I owned in Pennsylvania and I threw his easy chair, stereo and clothing into the street from a 2nd floor balcony. Gone like now.

On Sept 17, 2008: Senator John McCain said, as he had many times before, that he believed the fundamentals of the economy were "strong."Hours later he backpedaled, explaining that he had meant that American workers were Strong.

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Desideria (Moderator) says on Mar 17, 2005, 11:38:

vladi, a good point. I'll add that one on my list...no spoiled brats that can't keep their own noses clean. No whiners, complainers, "everything is better back home" people. On the other hand, if they bring enough money to support all the service personnel they need for their survival, it might work out anyway...

Cheers,
Desi

"When shall we three meet again? In thunder, lightning, or in rain?"(First Witch in Macbeth)

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fzrdan says on Mar 17, 2005, 11:40:

miamimike That is a great story! Give people like that what they have coming to them. Make people responsible for their actions. Letting this guy lounge around and be rude for three months only taught him that people will put up with his crap. Hopefully one day someone will force him to face reality.

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Scalestick says on Mar 17, 2005, 11:55:

I understand it may be difficult... fzrman, with all due respect once again, I believe ricolombia stated the person lied about their intentions for the visit, so obviously he had laid out some ground rules for the stay, which the person ignored.
As for tossing him out, how you go about that? I shouldn't really comment because some people are more tolerant or forgiving than others and then later regret they didn't act sooner. Anyway, sometimes we learn from our mistakes. I only hope faith is restored and people are more honest about their intentions when inquiring about staying at someones place. If it was a hotel, I think that's another story. Anyway have a good day

hasta

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adela says on Mar 17, 2005, 12:03:

jaja Elmo
# 3 of Desi's list if...so familiar for you, ajá? (I hope only for your "criminal face")

Màs fe, màs abrazos, màs besos, màs disculpas, màs visitas a nuestros amigos antiguos nos haràn màs plenos cada vez.

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elmodefoque says on Mar 17, 2005, 12:09:

everybody in barranquillaa says i got a criminal face, pero mi amor, how would you know that?

I'll get there, when I get there!

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kat1 (Moderator) says on Mar 17, 2005, 13:56:

Desi my husband says exactly the same if you live in Colombia with all that healthy food you don't need vitamins, but the problem is many people is no having that healthy food for example my nephew he prefers to buy a coke than have a good fresh fruit juice, or buy a hamburger to a good ajiaco you see......

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adela says on Mar 17, 2005, 14:08:

Elmo you are always
mentioning your face of criminal, but nah, we know that you
are such cute tipical Guajiro(just remembering your pretty son's face). Don't tell me you are honored this #3 just because other reasons....

Màs fe, màs abrazos, màs besos, màs disculpas, màs visitas a nuestros amigos antiguos nos haràn màs plenos cada vez.

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CasaSol says on Mar 17, 2005, 14:30:

Why... We allowed this person to stay with us because that was the agreement we had and it was our hope that over time things would get better. Well, they only got worse to the point where he was intending on leaving (sneaking out) with out so much as a thank you. This, after we took him all around the city, to the country (Rio Negro) to local bars clubs and introducing him to friends. As far as the "lay around and do nothing" point, it is absolutely correct that one can do whatever they want. But when they are sharing a house with two other people they might want to consider that maybe the hammock isn't reserved exclusively for their use. Additionally, I find it incredible that this person was so cheap they never spent the 10K pesos to see Botero's art! Call me a cultural snob or overly PC but c'mon you travel 3K miles to lay around in a hammock? We would have and wanted to ask him to leave any number of times but always felt bad about kicking someone out. So, we asked for it but it was the first and last time.

Ricolombia.com | The Guide to Colombian Culture, Crafts & Travel

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dwmte says on Mar 17, 2005, 14:41:

somebody above... mentioned giving them two weeks notice...WHAT? you're not trying to break a one year lease in beverly hills or santa barbara. you're taling about rooming in someones house in colombia, for christs sake. just throw their miserable ass out and be done with them. if you're not cabable of it...trust me there are plenty of folks who can and will, with a smile. if yuou're really pressed, invite an off duty police officer over, give them 10,000 or 20,000 and it's history.

too, you can tell interested tenants, that you would like them to register with DAS and get a paper stating that they will be staying at your house/address for such and such dates. and a clause about any problems, such issues will be reported on their visa. end of story.

dw

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Lauthra says on Mar 17, 2005, 19:12:

Ricolombia 'Call me a cultural snob or overly PC but c'mon you travel 3K miles to lay around in a hammock?'
Cultural snob.
It was a holiday! Just cos you would like to be all artsy and pretensious doesn't mean everyone does!
Nato ;)

Nato (='.'=)

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miamimike says on Mar 17, 2005, 20:31:

People Travel 3000 miles to Florida..... to lay in the Hammock and drink beer all the time. Its their choice. Its their Vacation. We all have different tastes and Likes. Seems like there were no Baseline ground rules laying out the specificsof what was/wasn't expected of your guest. For exactly the SAME reasons you mention, I NEVER stay at some someone's house. I Rent an efficiency Apartment(with a PRIVATE entrance)or go to a Hotel room. I want NO ONE Planning my day, looking at a clock as to what time it is when I walk through the door(and with who)Its My PERSONAL Business and not a topic for Roundtable discussion Chismosa with the Neighbors. I stayed with a family once in Bogota and learned my lesson--never again-only for lack of privacy issues. I have to attribute a lot of the blame to you RicoColombia, for not doing your due diligence and secondly, for attempting to control your Guest's Vacation.

On Sept 17, 2008: Senator John McCain said, as he had many times before, that he believed the fundamentals of the economy were "strong."Hours later he backpedaled, explaining that he had meant that American workers were Strong.

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quindioman says on Mar 18, 2005, 12:02:

If some Colombianos don't like the “class” of visitors their What does visiting colombia have to do with people looking for buildings to bomb?
As for the people that enter the USA (God bless America (and screw everyone else))..."with the sole intent of sucking as much out of our system as humanly possible"....well good ol Uncle Sam has never exploited anyone has he....?

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Lauthra says on Mar 18, 2005, 15:27:

Albatross 'I think you should follow MY advice - don't leave !'
I think he would encounter problems entering another country for I believe they must have certain lists like the one he posted full of wank, and he may just meet one or two of the criteria there...

What a load of rubbish.

I think people shouldn't visit Colombia, only if they think they're going to Canada or South Carolina...
Nato ;)

Nato (='.'=)

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dwmte says on Mar 18, 2005, 16:51:

south carolina??? is that close to medellin?

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fzrdan says on Mar 18, 2005, 18:20:

****Considering the comments in response to my original post it appears that a lot of the posters to this board should follow my advice -- just don't come. Colombia doesn't need you, in fact it's why they hate gringos to begin with! *****

Hate gringos? What? The only person I came across (in my limited travels to Colombia) that had anything bad to say about gringos was a taxi driver that didn't like gringos 'slamming' his door shut. I guess those gringos are used to a well built car, not the piece of crap he was driving.

Why would the average colombian hate a gringo? They think gringo men are just there to take the Colombianas?

If the gringo is an ass, people will not like him. If the Colombian is an ass, people will not like him either. Simple.


Oh wait, there was one more person I noticed that gave me a nasty look and said some nasty thing to me in Spanish. I was at the intercontinental with my novia and another gringo. This old lady maybe thought my novia was a prostitute or something. I don't know. She just stared at us for about 1/2 hour. When my novia left to use the facilities, the old lady walks by me, stares me down and said something in spanish that I didn't understand but I figured wasn't very nice! I just said back to her "Buenas tardes, como esta usted" She did not reply. I just chuckled. Bitchy old lady.

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Gomezman5 says on Mar 18, 2005, 18:53:

Fzrdan That is exactly what she thought. The problem is that you look like a gringo, and your girl is a typically hot sexy Calena (still no enya).
You and her stand out together, especially at the Intercontinental.

But I have to add, Colombians as a rule really don't have problem with girngos. Colombian people are very warm and hospitable. That is not to say that there are not many that don't articulate their dislike for gringos, but they never articulate their dislike.

I am not sure what promted or what the point of this thread was to begin with, but he said something derogatory about Rush Limbaugh....what a shame!! I think he is great. In fact, I was thinking of inviting him to go to Colombia with me.

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utopiacowboy says on Mar 18, 2005, 19:11:

Frzdan, you may not have noticed but Colombians hate it when anyone slams a car door or house door loudly. They like to shut things very gently. After a year of living here, I am proud to say that my three stepchildren are slamming doors as though they've lived here all their lives.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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platano says on Mar 18, 2005, 19:12:

Colombia, Drugs, Rush Limbaugh, Drugs G5,

You want to go to Colombia with El Maharajii?
Did Rush get out of going to jail for his illegal drug activity?
Has he been indicted? If so, I don't think he would be welcome in Colombia.

Plátano

plátano

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Lionheart says on Mar 18, 2005, 19:26:

Please check the counter-post ... ... in the Politics and War department.

It is saddening to read such a generalized judgemental list, based on the experience with one person. Many will read into this a general description of a gringo.

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fzrdan says on Mar 18, 2005, 20:34:

UC I think you are right. I didn't mean to shut the doors hard but the taxis are a bit different than the cars I usually ride in. If I don't give the door a good tug it doesn't shut. When I give my normal tug on the taxi in Colombia, it sounds like the car is about to fall apart. After a few grimaces from the taxi drivers, I learned to be more gentle.

Gomezman, I look like a gringo? Man, you hit the nail on the head. White skin (hell, even pink sometimes although I can get a nice dark tan with some effort), blonde hair, blue eyes. Is that the defenition of a gringo? Uh oh, now everyone knows what I look like. I better watch what I say here now.

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Gomezman5 says on Mar 19, 2005, 06:19:

Fzrdan No big deal. Contrary to what the Fantasy Folks say here, there are not a heck of a lot of Gringo looking people in Col. Aside and apart from that however, now that everyone out here knows what you like like, you have to worry more about what the fantasy folks here might do to you as opposed to what any Colombian will do to you when you are in Colombia......Hang in here Fzrdan.....make notes of who sends you some nasty PM's. I think you and I are similaryl situated.

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Gomezman5 says on Mar 19, 2005, 06:24:

Platano........ I really do not know what Rush's legal situation is at this point, but I think if he wanted to, he could find a way to get himself to Colombia, if going there was a priority of his.

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init4ass says on Mar 19, 2005, 08:11:

it might be difficult to find quality tourists if you are renting out a cheap room. i notice a lot a nutty people go to Colombia. if they are not there on business or not looking for some tail then they are usually whacked out.

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